Technical difficulties or hold up & let me get this shit off my chest…
So, nothing is working, I don’t know what’s wrong with me (or, well, I can assume what is) but nothing is working & the more I fail at getting shit done the more unmotivated I am to even try. It’s a hamster wheel & it just keeps going round & round & round…
Nothing is wrong, everything is pretty ok, it’s just me. And I am fully aware that this is a thing I’m going to have to deal with for a long time to come, it’s just frustrating; I go so well for such a long time and then the wheels just fall off, just like that, no bump in the road, the wheels just fall off under the weight of me.
It’s probably because (tmi) it’s shark week and it always has made me feel really shitty & I probably should go back on the pill so this doesn’t happen every four weeks, but hey, I’ve also never been particularly great at looking after myself 👍.
I do have ideas & they are things I really want to explore. I think what I am selling on Etsy isn’t ‘me’ enough. Don’t get me wrong, I love the stuff I am selling & I would wear all of it, but I don’t think it reflects ‘me as-a-whole’ enough. I think what I need to do is get brave & add more creativity to the things I sell. I love distressing jeans & I want to work more on that as well as altering/upcycling some garments which there are a few that I have some crazy ideas in mind for. Also, on my recent trip to Newtown I saw some garments that were made of, like, multiple garments stitched together, which sounds weird and I am lame at descriptions but I really like the idea of perhaps cutting two shirts in half & then stitching them together e.g. bottom half of one shirt with the top half of another, or maybe just swapping sleeves etc. I also adore lyrics & would love to stitch some on to t-shirt collars or sleeves etc. and maybe even some sassy quotes as well would be cool. I just don’t think my store is engaging enough or different enough, and I really want it to reflect who I am so I defiantly think going back to the drawing board is a good idea.
Which brings me back to what I was talking about last week ~ going back to the drawing board ~
I honestly didn’t get any ideas written down last week like I think I said I would. The whole week ended up being swallowed up by finances & being stressed about the lack there of & trying to work out budgets etc. which I did get sorted.
I think that’s another part of the problem/why things just feel shitty even though they are not. I just totally emotionally wrecked myself with all the crap dealing with finances, & I had to cancel my phone bill which was traumatic for other reasons, & then as I already stated -shark week- it just all become an emotional over load & if I wasn’t stressing over money or the lack of effort I am putting into the business I was asleep (which was, on average, half of every day).
So what the hell do I do now?!?!?!?!?!
I have a market to go to next Saturday so I have to make sure I am prepared for that, and it makes life a lot easier if I am ready to go by Thursday night.
At the market, I will also be over seeing some volunteers that are coming along with me. I am part of the Boomerang Bags movement and we will be launching our bags this weekend and I offered to share my stall as B.B is not-for-profit so we don’t have the funds to have our own stall. So that’s a cool thing, and I really am going to have to be on top of my game & well rested for that.
But until then???
I am collating a plan in my head as I write this, so as soon as I am done here Bring Me The Horizon is going on (very loudly) & I am going to sit on the floor of my studio with some A3 paper a make a mind map and a bunch of lists. I really need to get all of this crap out of my head & try to get back to that motivated/enthusiastic place.
I am thinking that I won’t post this till tonight so maybe I can give up guy an update on what I did get done today… so for now, peace out (12:10 p.m.) ✌
7.30 p.m. Waiting on veg to cook for dinner so I thought I’d better wrap this up… I went & bought a bunch of supplies today and I have a clear idea of what I am going to do next. You’ll probably have to bear with me because the next two weeks I am going to be up to the eye balls changing things up, but I promise to share updates as often as I can, especially on Instagram.
Catch you on the flip side my lil alien friends ♡👽♡